Wednesday morning, 29 October, D-Centre at Prince of Wales Hospital, Randwick, Sydney. It's drizzling and I hadn't bothered taking an umbrella with me.
My latest results from the d-clinic are of legitimate concern to me. My *HbA1c measured 7.3, that being a 15-point jump since the last time this score was measured, back in July 2007 where the figure was a relatively healthy 5.8. 7.3 is not critical, but it does suggest that over the past three months some sort of spike in my sugars has occured, at least since 2007. Maintaining this level of sugar in my blood is not healthy. I need to take action, and fast.
My fasting score was 8.8, that's fucking bad. I need to keep it around 6-ish, or under.
There was a time when I'd reversed this thing so well I'd got my fasting scores down to 4.5 and my HbA1c down to 5.0. 5.0 is a miracle score considering that two years previous my sugars were dwelling hideously in the nullifying stratsophere of 31 fasting. How I didn't just fucking collapse I have the Lord to thank for that. From about 2005-7 my sugars were averaging 5.7 & 5.8 HbA1c which are perfectly acceptable results. With an HbA1c of 7.3 it appears the diabetic genie is beginning to release its puerile vapours from the bottle that I'd hoped to seal for good.
The average score for HbA1c for a non-diabetic person is in the range of 4.0-6.0.
I suspect it'll be a pressing task to get that fucking genie back into the bottle and sealed up squarely without the help of medication. I don't have quite the same wide-eyed clarity or determination I had some years before where I'd quite performed the miraculous and bottled this disease. But I'm gonna have to do it as I so do not wish to have to stare down the face of medication and all of its side-effects and complications.
The clinician wanted me to go on to tablets. I said no. I'd been down that avenue before. Give me three months, I asked, resolutely. They complied. I'm due back to the clinic in February 2009, I hope I can get back to 5.8, or, realistically, 6-ish.
I'd already caused a bit of consternation with the secretaries that morning at the clinic as I hadn't taken in my doctor's referral letter. Honestly I couldn't be bottled fronting up to my doc, who doesn't actually take the time to care for the complexities of my dreaded-d, and ask him for a letter. Better just to deal with this myself I think. I realise as clear as mushroom I need to seek a new doctor and preferably one who is naturopathically inclined.
I suspect that a large measure of d-control is in having a natural therapist at your service, to keep you grounded, prevent you straying, and keep you focussed on the incessant, constant mission of d-control, including jabbing your fingers for blood glucose measurements. I had a naturopath/homeopath for a while and that was good. I need to get back into the loop again.
I don't care how much money this costs, health is the number one priority. I'm going to have to get back into the habit of doing those fucking jabs on my fingers again, 3-4 times a week, a practice that I loathe but is nonetheless necessary to ground me back into an awareness that I am a 'd', and to help monitor and therefore regulate my actions & diet accordingly.
Good news is my cholesterol, kidney function etal results were all very good. Only the sugar stuff, is problematic. I'm taking an additional liver test with my next lot of blood-letting in February as I've had past problems with hight bilirubin levels, but with a daily intake of herbal liver tablets, and a mug of dandelion tea each day, I'm hoping that sorts itself out.
I can't do too much more as far as exercise or diet are concerned. It could well help to become that bit more holistic however. Bikram yoga is on the cards, maybe acupuncture. My friend can give me chiro. I should meditate more. Ideally get away from this fucking bejewelled city of evil distractions and wayward diamonds. Live with folliage, fresh air, glistening leaves & trees, hills, cottage, chooks, birds, dogs, ... For food I remain happy to be chomping on salad all day. I'm not interested in the junky, cakey, chocolately pastry stuff. My only vice is coffee, and that I do not wish to forsake. And golly I do enjoy a beer and/or wine at the appropriate times. For me it's strictly a moderation only thing, but sometimes on those odd occasions I do think life is too short...
When I left the clinic that Wednesday morning the drizzle had strengthened to horizontal, windswept rain. I was drenched by the time I made it to my car. Funny how the exterior circumstance can often reflect the inner mood.
*HbA1c is the measurement of sugar in the haemoglobin and represents an overall assessment or average level of glucose in the blood for the previous 10-12 weeks to the day the blood sample was taken.
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