Wednesday, May 7, 2008

we're All in the same Boat

where mars crosses neptune’s borders
dissonance afloats
we had two fatal boating accidents over the past week here in sunny ozz
one in Sydney one in Melbourne
the Sydney accident involved a heady group of young people and their case of beer
roaring around in a small jetty
and crashing it mid-harbour
5 people died last I heard
the Melbourne boat disaster is the one that particularly intrigues me
this involved a man of 48 years
he clinched a boating deal on Saturday morning
a week after he officially paid for the boat
a reconditioned 1955 model
he was so excited about it
after lunch he was to take his extended family out for a spin
along the yarra entwines
after refuelling the boat
it instantly blew up into heavy black smoke and fuelled flame
the boat disintegrated immediately
as did Anthony’s parents who were in the boat
some of the family were injured
some seriously some not
the sunday paper snapped a photo of Anthony
being rushed away on a stretcher
he had red curlyish hair and beard
wearing a footy tshirt over a grey pullover
he looked like he was a gym workerouterer
he was sitting upright on that stretcher
screaming aloud for his parents
who’d obviously combusted to nothingness
prior to any glint of cognition or awareness on their part
it was the look on Anthony’s face that got me
I thought he was in his mid-30’s maybe
he was actually 48
psychically the photo had him looking like a boy of 6
in his abject look of screaming frozen terror
similar to ‘action’ photos of Vietnamese children whose villages had just been napalmed
it’s almost as if 40 years of teenager cum adulthood
were irretrievably blown out from his psyche
utterly shaken to it’s foundations
in THAT one horrifying instant

life doesn’t compromise
life is
life is the fact
when I was 19 I was really getting into Castaneda books
such as the legendary journey to ixlan
(still one of my favourites)
I was reminded of one of don juan’s lessons
a warrior lives his life as if it’s his last dance on earth
at the time I imbibed this stuff with keen enthusiasm and excitation
though the fact is you gotta clear a whole lot of sludgy emotional shit from yerself
before you come anywhere close to truly ‘getting’ this
and now at 38 years
these ideas are dawning on me from a deep place
I don’t particularly care if I win or lose money
just have a naturally zen approach to things
though losing the people I love – that’s hard, hard for anyone
including Anthony
all the worldly time and universal momentum
required to develop a boy into a man
all the man’s desires
recreational pursuits
his desire for sex and having it sated
his barbecues his cars his 4wds his cricket and footy and all the rest of it
his kids

mainly his unchallenged expectancy that life is all of the aforementioned and that’s about it

built up over a whole life
were shattered, irreversibly blown apart in a single instant
it was plastered on his face
like the sea of Hell
Anthony may have been a “good bloke” in the true ozzie sense of the word
and god nose he does not deserve this
but I sense that Anthony may not have delved into the facts of life too deeply
that what one expects can be taken away from us at any given moment
that the people we love can be blown away – without compunction or mercy
life is the fact
the fact is death
time is what separates us from our separation from our physical bodies
all are born to die
as all we love will pass away or leave us
…including the civil structures we work and leisure in
and as our loves and passions wane with the encroachment of physical impairment
or physical death
well that can happen to any of us
at any given moment
is this not the fact???
better to live it than ignore it
because true understanding can rain
on those inevitable times of trauma
Anthony will be demonised for the rest of his life
with utter guilt and remorse
it’s likely to eat him away
unless of course he understands the truth
that lyfe is the fact
life is a tapestry of circumstantial events
with cause and effect factors
events are mere externalities or gateways
hiding more profound and underhanded realities
sometimes these can be read as symbols of sorts
sometimes events involve tragic deaths
but factual
like the old saying
when’yr number’s up, it’s up!
life is the fact or would you deny it?
it’s all cosmic Will isn’t it?
living Itself in the eternal now
with the sublime moments
coexisting with the darkest most life-shattering events
appearing in the moment least expected
...I wish Anthony well

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